Before I get into the overly reflective post about my life and mind, I would like to address the difficulty of adulting. Let me tell ya, it is hard. Shoutout to all the newbies that know how to adult and do a good job at it. Another shoutout to all the real adults that have been adulting for years. You’re the real MVP’s.
So, I have this habit of making major, rash decisions within a matter of minutes. I’m also extraordinarily stubborn and want to make decisions based on my perspective and opinion, not on everyone else’s. However, I don’t consider this a weakness. I, for the most part, know what’s good and what’s bad for me. If I’m in a position that isn’t aiding my growth, it’s not a place I want to stay, and I certainly don’t have a problem stepping away when it is for my own happiness. I believe in the importance of being selfish for your own well being (to an extent, of course). As I’ve said before, I also believe in stepping out of your comfort zone. Taking risks is important. Experiencing new things is important. The problem is when these risks and experiences begin to shut you down rather than build you up. But, that is how we grow. We learn our strengths and our weaknesses by getting knocked down and standing back up, and I am slowly becoming aware of mine.
Back to the decision making, I consider it a strength. I made the decision to move to a new place knowing I would be going in blind. Fleeing from my comfort zone had been a priority of mine for a while, and I did just that. Along with fulfilling that dream, I also got slapped in the face with adulthood and the unpredictability of the world. That being said, I had to make my first REAL adult decision that would lead me to the most stable path for my future (and my bank account, let’s be honest). So, I’m back in Phoenix. I’m back with the people I love who have the ability to make me laugh until I cry. I’m back, but stronger and wiser than I was before. I didn’t return because I felt like I couldn’t make a life for myself in Portland or because I missed home (trust me, the desert life is not me), but because I want my future to be the best it can be, and I believe this is how that will happen.
– Naturally inspired. Locally aware. Universally beautiful. With love, Kylee.